Mary Poppins
Mary Elizabeth Poppins, married name Mary Alfred, is an English governess, musician and professional skateboarder.
| Mary Poppins | |
|---|---|
 Mary Poppins | |
| Vital statistics | |
| Title | The nanny herself. |
| Gender | Female |
| Born | ca. 420 B.C. |
| Died | ? |
| Health | Immortal |
| Level | 69 |
| Status | Alive |
| Location | London, England |
| Allies | Herbert Alfred The Banks children |
| Enemies | Big Smoke Kimi Räikkönen |
“I made her even more famous, Pam, deal with it!”
Poppins became best known for being the subject of a series of novels by P. L. Travers portraying her as an immortal magical nanny; in reality she was incredibly skilled at gaslighting children and scoffing at them upon being confronted, though it is hinted that she is indeed inhuman.
Prior to her career as a nanny, Poppins worked as a secretary in her native London and took up other odd jobs such as a messenger and switchboard operator. She also played as a bassist for various rock, metal and punk bands such as The Cure and The Faction. Poppins also had a notable career in skateboarding where she nearly beat Tony Hawk in a vert contest. After taking care of her charges Michael and Jane Banks, Mary underwent plastic surgery due to complaints by Julie Andrews saying she "looked too much like her" and later went on to take care of Michael's children following the death of his wife.
Trivia edit
- She likes rum punch, even inventing a nigh-deadly cocktail called lean.
- Poppins speaks fluent English, French, Kotlin and x86 assembly.
- She is the only person known to beat Chuck Norris in a staring contest.